austraLasia 1439
"Sometimes trotting, sometimes galloping" (MO Ch 26) - for when the community car is a thing of the past
ROME: 10th February 2006 -- It seems pretty much official now that the future of the community vehicle, meaning anything from ye olde Roman Vespa to the absolutely essential 4 wheel drive, will soon be a thing of the past. This is nothing to do with the Constitutions or any proposed theme for GC26. It just seems that 'we are addicted to oil', as one man said recently, and with things not going all that well in the Middle East, Nigeria, USA or anywhere else where there's cyclones, cartoons, or just not enough oil left, the time will soon come, sadly, when you can't run a car any more. And gas? Well, things are not going too well in Russia on that score at the moment, so we can forget that as well.
But cheer up. There's always the horse. The horse does have certain advantages for communities. You will never have the problem of arriving in the garage to discover the tank is empty yet again, and fodder is much cheaper than those other fuels. No costly garages needed either - a little pocket handkerchief's worth of free land, preferably with a fence around it, is enough. If you think it is not much fun taking a car key only to discover that the vehicle had a spare, and has gone for the week, imagine the fun you can have cornering and saddling up the horse. The horse, of course, will be having much more fun than you.
Community expenses, then, will be well down. Speeding and parking fines will be a thing of the past, and the Rector or bursar will be able to heave a sigh of relief since theirs are the names from which points are usually deducted when nobody else has owned up.
Speedsters in the community should be warned; a horse has only two speeds, as Don Bosco admits: trot and gallop. There is the story of the priest (I've altered names to protect the individual and the horse concerned!) who bought a horse which had been trained to respond to two prayerful commands - it would stop at 'Amen' and go again with a simple 'Thanks be to God'. Taking the horse for a test drive, he tried out 'Amen' and the horse stopped just like the man said. When he said 'Thanks be to God' though, it took off at a gallop, or, as Don Bosco puts it "he bolted down the road and across the fields and meadows". Father held on as tight as he could and when he saw a cliff looming he frantically screamed, "Dear God, PLEASE let the horse stop, PLEASE!! AMEN!". The horse screeched to a halt right at the edge of the cliff.....and with great relief, Father yelled 'Praise the Lord!' At this point in the story, all resemblance to persons living or dead, ceases.
Speaking of buying a horse, I offer at least the following advice to the community. People have been known to donate horses to a community, since they soon discover that the basic rule of thumb with these animals is that one horse in a family is not enough, but two is too many. However, if someone should donate a large wooden horse to the community, then it's a case of caveat emptor, I think. There are a few other caveats as well. You would be advised to check the beast immediately after purchase. If a wheel comes loose on a new car you are at least able to head straight to the mechanic and get it fixed. A vet or farrier might not be so impressed if you bring back a three-legged horse. As for taking off a Sunday afternoon to do some mild tinkering under the vehicle, tightening a nut here and squirting some oil there.....not at all advisable with a horse I'm afraid. A little care, too, with cleaning; horses don't take too kindly to 'Kitten' or whatever other cut and polish you normally use.
And finally, back to the vexed fuel question. Recall the old (very old) Esso ad 'Put a tiger in your tank'? Not politically correct nowadays. Now, if you simply must keep a car for the community, and none of the above arguments in favour of horse power has convinced you, let me make one last try. Keep your car and buy a horse as well. A British inventor called Harold Bates said he has been running his car, a five ton truck and heating his home on a few buckets on methane from heated-up horse manure. He got his 1953 Hillman up to 75 kph!
Back to the serious stuff tomorrow as the Rector Major arrives in Hong Kong. What started all this? I was reading Memoirs of the Oratory! Don Bosco has an excellent horse story there. told against himself and with a little lesson to learn. Chapter 26. The story takes up the entire chapter. Enjoy!
JBF
VOCABULARY
caveat emptor: Latin for 'buyer beware'.
________________________________
AustraLasia is an email service for the Salesian Family of Asia Pacific. It also functions as an agency for ANS based in Rome. For RSS feeds, subscribe to www.bosconet.aust.com/rssala.xml
"Sometimes trotting, sometimes galloping" (MO Ch 26) - for when the community car is a thing of the past
ROME: 10th February 2006 -- It seems pretty much official now that the future of the community vehicle, meaning anything from ye olde Roman Vespa to the absolutely essential 4 wheel drive, will soon be a thing of the past. This is nothing to do with the Constitutions or any proposed theme for GC26. It just seems that 'we are addicted to oil', as one man said recently, and with things not going all that well in the Middle East, Nigeria, USA or anywhere else where there's cyclones, cartoons, or just not enough oil left, the time will soon come, sadly, when you can't run a car any more. And gas? Well, things are not going too well in Russia on that score at the moment, so we can forget that as well.
But cheer up. There's always the horse. The horse does have certain advantages for communities. You will never have the problem of arriving in the garage to discover the tank is empty yet again, and fodder is much cheaper than those other fuels. No costly garages needed either - a little pocket handkerchief's worth of free land, preferably with a fence around it, is enough. If you think it is not much fun taking a car key only to discover that the vehicle had a spare, and has gone for the week, imagine the fun you can have cornering and saddling up the horse. The horse, of course, will be having much more fun than you.
Community expenses, then, will be well down. Speeding and parking fines will be a thing of the past, and the Rector or bursar will be able to heave a sigh of relief since theirs are the names from which points are usually deducted when nobody else has owned up.
Speedsters in the community should be warned; a horse has only two speeds, as Don Bosco admits: trot and gallop. There is the story of the priest (I've altered names to protect the individual and the horse concerned!) who bought a horse which had been trained to respond to two prayerful commands - it would stop at 'Amen' and go again with a simple 'Thanks be to God'. Taking the horse for a test drive, he tried out 'Amen' and the horse stopped just like the man said. When he said 'Thanks be to God' though, it took off at a gallop, or, as Don Bosco puts it "he bolted down the road and across the fields and meadows". Father held on as tight as he could and when he saw a cliff looming he frantically screamed, "Dear God, PLEASE let the horse stop, PLEASE!! AMEN!". The horse screeched to a halt right at the edge of the cliff.....and with great relief, Father yelled 'Praise the Lord!' At this point in the story, all resemblance to persons living or dead, ceases.
Speaking of buying a horse, I offer at least the following advice to the community. People have been known to donate horses to a community, since they soon discover that the basic rule of thumb with these animals is that one horse in a family is not enough, but two is too many. However, if someone should donate a large wooden horse to the community, then it's a case of caveat emptor, I think. There are a few other caveats as well. You would be advised to check the beast immediately after purchase. If a wheel comes loose on a new car you are at least able to head straight to the mechanic and get it fixed. A vet or farrier might not be so impressed if you bring back a three-legged horse. As for taking off a Sunday afternoon to do some mild tinkering under the vehicle, tightening a nut here and squirting some oil there.....not at all advisable with a horse I'm afraid. A little care, too, with cleaning; horses don't take too kindly to 'Kitten' or whatever other cut and polish you normally use.
And finally, back to the vexed fuel question. Recall the old (very old) Esso ad 'Put a tiger in your tank'? Not politically correct nowadays. Now, if you simply must keep a car for the community, and none of the above arguments in favour of horse power has convinced you, let me make one last try. Keep your car and buy a horse as well. A British inventor called Harold Bates said he has been running his car, a five ton truck and heating his home on a few buckets on methane from heated-up horse manure. He got his 1953 Hillman up to 75 kph!
Back to the serious stuff tomorrow as the Rector Major arrives in Hong Kong. What started all this? I was reading Memoirs of the Oratory! Don Bosco has an excellent horse story there. told against himself and with a little lesson to learn. Chapter 26. The story takes up the entire chapter. Enjoy!
JBF
VOCABULARY
caveat emptor: Latin for 'buyer beware'.
________________________________
AustraLasia is an email service for the Salesian Family of Asia Pacific. It also functions as an agency for ANS based in Rome. For RSS feeds, subscribe to www.bosconet.aust.com/rssala.xml
